This is an extract from The Rosicrucian #85 (Aug, 2021).

Have you read the words of Robert Frost, in the last verse of The Road Not Taken? “I shall be telling this with a sigh, somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less travelled by, and that has made all the difference.”

It deals with my favourite philosophical question: Choice. What choices do we have and what do we do with those choices? We can ponder endlessly how much of life is predetermined, how we are limited by heredity, intellect, social status, environment or economics. That’s not the issue here; nor do I believe that it’s important. However limited our choices may be, what matters is what we accomplish through the choices we make.

Victor Frankl survived the death camps of World War II, and wrote in his book Man’s Search for Meaning:

We who lived in concentration camps can remember the men who walked through the huts comforting others, giving away their last piece of bread. They may have been few in number, but they offer sufficient proof that everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of the human freedoms: to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.

I believe we have a great deal of choice; that most of us do not make the most of these choices and that we tend to live our lives based on other people’s decisions and expectations. I believe that, too often, we lack the courage to act on our decisions. Not to decide is to decide. I believe this freedom to choose is one of the most important aspects of our lives, and that to act responsibly on those choices determines the success or failure of our lives.

It’s important to differentiate between freedom and license. Make no mistake, this is not the concept of “if it feels good, do it.” All choice combines freedom with responsibility; they are inseparable. We pay a price for all our decisions and our indecisions, but we’ve the individual freedom to determine for ourselves when that price is too high.

Each day brings new choices and multiple decisions have to be made. All choices matter and the potential for a better life is all around us. No matter how trivial our choices may seem to be, the decisions we make determine who we become and what the quality of our lives will be. We become in a very real sense the consequences of our choices, or rather our decisions to those choices. So, let me present some areas in which we can exercise our freedom to choose.

We can choose to make time for the people and animals we love

We can choose whether or not we believe that all people can develop within themselves an inner core of good and sanctity. All living things seek light and through it life; neither plants nor animals can survive long without the beneficial effects of light from our resident star, whether they receive it directly and visually, or indirectly through the energy it provides. And beyond the physical light that we humans absolutely must have in order to survive, lies the ‘inner light’ which is equally essential for our survival. That magnificent inner partner to light that we commonly know as ‘life’, and specifically the special form known to mystics as the Vital Life Force, this is the ultimate source of our existence, and we must seek it and nurture it wherever it exists.

Of course we can choose to move into the shadows, away from light and life; but we will in that case eventually die a lonely and unhappy death. Denial of the inner light does not diminish its existence in the warm glow of actuality, and choosing to avoid it, and thereby avoiding life itself, merely changes us for the worse. Better then to choose light and thereby life, and to do so positively, enthusiastically and above all willingly.

We can also choose love. We can choose which people and what creatures matter to us, and then nurture our relationship with them tenderly as treasured parts of our own being. We can choose to make time for the people and animals we love; and where we initially have none to love, we can choose to go out and seek people and animals to care about. Good, lasting relationships require willing commitments by all involved; but we have the upper hand as we know this and must therefore lead the way by bringing love into the lives of all within reach.

We can also choose health, both mental and physical. Again, we choose not from our limitations, but from the freedom we have to dream of a better self. And where we have health conditions that simply cannot be resolved, we focus all our energy on at least maintaining the status quo, and better still, improving our health in those areas that have not been damaged beyond repair. This positive approach of holding on to and treasuring the areas of health we have, is crucial to our wider wellbeing. We can choose not to abuse our bodies through overwork, through alcohol or drug abuse, through overeating, through not exercising, etc., the choice is of course ours. And for those of us who have generally good health already, we can choose not to whine about the inevitable age-related aches and pains that we know will eventually enter our lives. Choose a positive, can-do attitude therefore towards maintaining your mind and body in as healthy a state as you can.

Remember too that we can choose to surround ourselves with beauty. We can dream of better places, more beautiful surroundings, and then go about creating our little corners of paradise. Even a plant on a windowsill can bring beauty and grace into an otherwise drab existence. For me, each day includes simple pleasures: a walk around the block, a few coins for the beggar on the corner, fresh flowers on the mantelpiece, light streaming through the stained glass windows of my local church, music, candlelight, poetry. So many small things are there just for the taking, even if our circumstances are humble. Seek out therefore the beauty that brings you refinement and happiness.

The easiest way of achieving happiness is to choose to be grateful even for the small things in life.

And finally, we can choose happiness. I know…, how can one be happy if one is daily faced with frustrations and unpleasantness. It isn’t easy to be happy, but it is possible. The easiest way of achieving happiness is to choose to be grateful even for the small things in life. Even if you have to pretend to be grateful, do so; for that pretence will, when sincerity is added, turn into genuine gratitude.

This may seem like cold comfort, but please believe me: choosing to experience gratitude, and doing so with sincerity, is one of the most important choices you will ever make. For from that gratitude, no matter how small it is at first, a whole universe of happiness will open up. If someone makes you unhappy, remember that you can choose the opposite state merely by counting your meagre blessings one by one, and amplifying them to the point where happiness returns. So, choose to be happy, and begin the process of by choosing to be grateful.

Each Day, a Choice

We can choose to have fun, to be spontaneous. I have a small magnetic plaque on my fridge which reads: “Life is not a dress rehearsal.” I take that as meaning that life is serious, it’s for real. Yes, I know life is also like a big classroom, and yes we are here to learn our lessons; but we mustn’t treat life as though we can repeatedly do an ‘undo’ as we do on our computer when we’ve made a mistake. Taking life seriously, even if it’s a school in the broader scheme of things, means that we make better choices, and live with the consequences of our choices without a whimper.

In other words, choose to succeed and don’t make your choices on the basis that you just want to see how thing will pan out. Don’t treat life as a mere dress rehearsal, an experiment. Life’s for real, so make proper choices and live with the consequences. We can choose to dream, and those dreams must surely be pleasant and bring happiness to us. Create your own ideals, make your own dreams, and then make it come true.

The crucial thing is to actually make choices, and never sit of the fence more than a brief moment as you decide. Have the courage to choose and to live with your choices, no matter how they turn out. You are the ‘pilot in command’ and there is ultimately no one else who can take responsibility for your life. Remember that proper choosing means selecting the best parts of life and leaving behind the rest. Delete from your life all things that hold you back or keep you in a state of weakness. If someone consistently makes you uncomfortable or unhappy, why are they a part of your life? If the food in a restaurant is poor, or the service slovenly, what so you care what a surly person thinks of you when you leave without tipping? You don’t have to answer the phone every time just because it’s ringing, and if you don’t like your life, look for honourable ways of making it better.

Where unhappiness exists, choose a strategy to change things. The most important step is simply to choose to take that first step out of your dungeon, even if you can’t see immediately how to escape. Choose to change things, and accept nothing less than a complete transformation. Make a list of the things that bring you comfort and support, and those that detract you from peace of mind and happiness. I’ve made some deletions in my life. I no longer make room for plastic flowers in the home, wine in paper cups, chronically negative people bothering me, restaurant meals that cost more than I earn in a day. They’re all gone and I haven’t missed any of them. Their deletion leaves more time for the things that matter to me, and I pursue happiness without hurting other in the process.

All choices involve consequences, and responsibility for those choices. We have to pay our dues, but what a small price there is for true freedom! We are the sum total of our choices, and our lives are lived out living with the consequences of what we have chosen. Choose life therefore, and make it a happy one!